Girl crush, reversed.

I think I have a female admirer.

On Saturday afternoon I was standing in line at the neighborhood Safeway, about to purchase some goodies for a cookout that evening, when suddenly I felt eyes on me. You probably know the feeling.

Glancing over to the next aisle, I see a girl, about my age with a straight blonde bob, staring at me. It wasn't one of those stares where you wonder if you have a big booger dangling from your right nostril or if perhaps she recognizes you from somewhere but can't figure out where. No, this was a very peculiar mix of admiration, curiosity, and maybe jealousy? It was also a weird stare that made me sense some kind of hostility or something that wasn't exactly the friendliest of feelings. I can't say for sure, just that we girls--we sense these things.

In any case, chick was totally checking me out. (I was looking kind of cute after a shower in hemp pants, a white wife beater, my favorite Rainbow flip flops, and some crunchy bling. Heh.)

I'm really not being conceited here. I mean, I check other girls out all the time. I admire. I pick up fashion tips. I wonder what it's like to be them. I develop 5 minute crushes. Girl crushes, that's what they are. They're perfectly normal. What I'm saying is that I was part flattered, part uncomfortable. She was fixated on me, scowling almost, for what seemed like forever. I smiled at her and instantly, she looked away.

When I swung around the parking lot in my car, she was leaving the store. I looked in my rearview mirror and there she was, still semi-scowling, still staring after me. Intently. I almost waved.

So last night, I am walking Lucy around the school before going out to dinner with Kevin. (OK, the curl up with O magazine and sleep thing never happened. Of course I had to get my margarita on!). We pass the tennis courts and.......there she is! I don't look at her, but still feel those eyes. I'm sure she recognizes me. And I'm certain she's staring.

What is her perception of me, I wonder. Why the hostile stares? Why am I so weirded out by it?Why do I feel kind of special about it at the same time? I tell Kevin about her when we get into the car to go to the restaurant. Baby, this chick has a crush on me. She's playing tennis at the school.

What does Kevin do? Just like the embarrassing Mom who wants to check out the little boy on the playground who pulls your hair, he whips the car to the left, towards the school.

"Oh my god, baby! No! What, you're going to do a drive-by?" I shriek.

"I want to check this chick out." He laughs, visibly pleased at my squirming. Kevin is loving this.

He pulls up alongside the tennis court, driving very slowly, as I am ducking in the front seat.

"Does she see you, does she see you?" I whisper.

"No, she's playing. She's not that cute."

"Baby! Are you jealous?!"

"No, I think it's pretty funny."

"Maybe I should sit up, so she can see what a hot boyfriend I have!"

Now, I'm the one who thinks it's pretty funny. And I laugh about it all through dinner.