Friday, February 02, 2007

Craving a Lil' Smoky Cheeseball.

This week me and another blogger were interviewed by The Wall Street Journal for a piece about evite. She wanted to know how we used evite and if we had any "funny" anecdotes about it.

Aaaaaaahem. No. In fact, I said something to the extent of "Well, if you call returning a full keg because people who responded yes to the evite didn't show, funny."

(OK, so she might have thought that funny. I was thinking bummer, mainly.)

I don't know if it's really evite itself that irritates me - as in, do I hate the player or hate the game? (Or some variation of that cliche.) Maybe it's the player. For example, why the hell don't people respond? We can SEE that you've looked at the damn thing, we can SEE that you've looked at it twice, even three times, in fact.

(For the record, allow me to point out that I don't have any evites out there right now. I'm not bitter anymore, thank you very much.)

Slightly less irritating: when people say yes on the evite, and then don't show. Things come up, OK. I get that. But you CAN change your response. In fact, I would think that it would be easier for some people to go in to the evite and repsond NO than make a phone call. (Although a phone call is nicer and somewhat better etiquette.)

Anyway, along these same lines, I just finished I Like You: Hospitality Under The Influence by Amy Sedaris.

[This book KILLED me. I laughed out loud the whole way through. Best thing I've read in a long long time. Sooooo funny.]

Her book is jokey but it isn't necessarily a joke book. She truly makes some awesome points about entertaining, one of them being: fucking RSVP to shit, people! (In so many words.) It's insulting to your hostess not to. By "teeter-tottering" you're implying to your hostess that you're waiting to see if something better will come along before you decide. Plus, someone was nice enough to invite you to something, don't you think you should be nice enough to respond, regardless of the fact that you might hate evite?

What do you guys think about evite? What do you like or dislike about it? How is it changing the way we socialize?


At 2:52 PM, Blogger Tripping Daisy said...

Yes, definately respond. No matter what the answer is. I also loved Amy Sedaris' book. I giggled uncontrollably. :)

At 6:22 PM, Anonymous Kath said...

So...should I respond here or just wait until the article is published??

Nah, I'll give you guys the scoop and tell ya what I told the reporter.

I'm quoting me 'People who don't respond to Evite have no manners'.

The great thing is, most, if not all, of the bloggers that read Rosie and know me HAVE responded to my Evites which gives you massive brownie points in my BPB (Brownie Point Book). Yes, it's true. I remember crap like that!

Another quote 'How incredibly difficult is it to choose? Yes. No.Maybe. It's not rocket science".

Rosie and I will be at the Tattered Cover handing out autographed copies of the WSJ next week. Then we can all go out for a Lil' Smokey Cheeseball. And martini's. But only if you respond in the affirmative!

At 7:30 PM, Blogger Shmeder said...

I think it's handy to be able to see what I've got coming up in the next few days. I always respond. If I'm a maybe I normally say why. I don't pussy foot around for the most part.

I also respond so that the host/hostess can't see how many times I view it. I really don't need anyone to know how OCD I can be.

At 11:02 PM, Blogger Howard said...

Oh, good. One of the monkeys got me that book for Xmas. Have you pulled the book cover off and seen what printed on the back?

At 5:11 PM, Blogger Rosie said...

No! But I am going to go do that right now!!

At 4:31 PM, Anonymous hubs said...

i think evite sucks. sometimes i actually am waiting for something better to show up. don't force me to make this obvious to you unless you can handle it. and if you are so concerned with how many times i double checked the time on your stupid evite then pick up the phone and give me a call. if you don't have my phone number don't be surprised i didn't respond. evite is, in a word, impersonal.

of course i really do appreciate being invited to things though. and none of the "yous" above are directed torward any specific person.

At 5:06 PM, Blogger Rosie said...

I would agree- sometimes I too just want to take the easy way out and wait and see, especially if it's for something I'm not entirely sure I want to go to.


I still at least reply maybe. How hard is it to say "Hey, I'm not sure what's going on that weekend, but I'll keep your party in mind?" That's certainly not going to offend anyone.

I think it just boils down to common courtesy - replying SOMETHING says that you received the invite and "thanks for inviting me." Not replying anything is just plain fucking rude. Or lazy.

(I also think it's rather selfish to assume that the hostess is going to take the time to tailor her invites to everyone's preferred methods. There are people out there who hate talking on the phone too (and I am one of them) but I would never ever be so callous as to bitch about the fact that someone called me to invite me to a party. I'd be flattered that I was even invited at all.)

At 10:04 PM, Anonymous Kath said...

And your # would be??


Seriously, this is good to know. I found out thru my little WSJ experiment that 3 of my blogger buddies HATE LOATHE DESPISE Evite. And that's cool. I thanked them for letting me know, promised to never ever send them an Evite again for as long as I know them, and added if I am having an event I'll send them a personal email to give them the option of checking my Evite Link.

Cause as cold and impersonal as you think it might be...and not denying your right to your own me, Evite is a godsend.

All the info you need on one little email. The only way it could get any simpler would be if you could read my mind. And since we all know I lost my mind back in FL, that's just not gonna happen.

At 12:40 AM, Anonymous hubs said...

kath, you can text my phone from my website.

there is a 'maybe' button on evite? I didn't know that and i have looked at tons of evites. too much technology. and i'm lazy, and sometimes rude. i have never expect a host/ess to cater to me, i'm just saying what i like (you did ask for my opinion, right?). evite is a mailing list not an invitation.

At 9:19 AM, Anonymous HDW said...

When I sent out fancy-dancy little invitations via snail mail for my birthday bash last year, it was like pulling teeth to get people to RSVP. They only had to pick up the phone and call my girlfriend. And still, on the night of, we had no real idea how many people would show up and there were people that hadn't said yes and showed up anyway.

Opposed to this past weekend where I sent out an evite and everyone who RSVP'd 'yes' was there, and everyone who was a maybe was a maybe. Only one person who didn't say yes or no, only could see that he'd checked the evite showed up. And it turns out he had told my husband he'd be there, and HDH forgot to tell me.

Either way, I don't find it impersonal. I'm happy to have been invited and included to whatever was going on regardless.

At 9:24 AM, Blogger Rosie said...

Yes! I did ask your opinion, hubs! And I'm always grateful for it because you just have a certain knack for getting a conversation started :)

No matter how you spin it - ALL invitations really are nothing more than "a list." I don't think it's any more impersonal than snail mail or a voicemail.

So goddamn it! I'm gonna keep on using evite.

Now onto a new blog post. Thanks for weighing in!!


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