The 6-hour post.*

I can't focus today, y'all. It's SEVENTY FIVE DEGREES out. It is pure torture being inside with no windows (ones that look out into the great outdoors from where I sit, that is.) Days like this are numbered until the long winter sets in. (Alright. Shut up. I know I'm not living in the Little House on the Prairie. I know it could be worse. I know CO is sunny all the time.) I could have it be like this everyday and I would never, ever miss snow. Someone: go ahead and kick my ass out of Colorado for saying that. But it's true, and not all the Wellbutrin in the world (which I'm not on, by the way, but I hear it rocks the hizzouse for SAD) can make me think otherwise. I hate winter. There, I said it.

Anyway, fuck if I know what it was I came here to say in the first place. It wasn't to talk about the weather. As I said, the focusing! Not happening!

Actually, I do have all these mini-blog topics vying for your attention in my sassy little red head, but because of NaBloPoMo (which, for some reason always makes me think of Napalm, the shit they used in 'Nam), I feel like I have to ration them out just to make sure I don't run out of things to say. But here, I'll unload a few...

Topic #1: Food for the needy. Because we won't be running the Turkey Trot this year due to my ungodly early and expensive flight to Cincinnati on Thanksgiving morning, (there goes that charitable activity, and about 600 calories burned, along with a guilt-free dinner, wah!), we decided to fill a brown paper bag that someone left on our porch with food for the needy instead.

Last night over dinner I asked if Kevin would run over to Safeway this week and pick up some stuff for the bag. He raised his eyebrows. "Safeway?" "What's wrong with that?" I asked. "So, you mean you want me to go get some cans of creamed canned corn? The same canned corn you refuse to eat?"

And just like that, dear god! The boy made a point. A very very good one. A big one. He called me out on exactly the same thing I've been preaching high and low in recent months......and that is that just because people are poor does not mean they have to eat shitty, junky, unhealthy processed food.

Now, maybe you're thinking that ANY cans of corn are better than NO cans of corn. And that someone who has nothing to eat would be very appreciative of a can of corn, and that I should go fuck myself, pompous Whole Foods shopper. Welllll. OK. You might be right. Who do I think I am, anyways?

(Apparently I'm someone who thinks I have a very argumentative readership.)

Whatever. Let me make my point, and it is this: Give a man a box of Fruity Pebbles, he will eat for a day and probably get fat and have cavities, teach a man to purchase a bulk bag of organic brown rice cereal, and not only will he eat for a lifetime (because he will be healthy), but he will also maybe learn that THE BAG OF ORGANIC BROWN RICE CEREAL COST AT LEAST 2 DOLLARS LESS THAN THE SHITTY FRUITY PEBBLES SOME IDIOT PUT IN HIS THANKSGIVING BASKET IN THE FIRST PLACE.

So, guess where I went over lunch? (Wild Oats!) And guess what I bought for the charitable food drive? (A bunch of good fucking shit, that's what.)

So yeah, I love it when I get caught up in my own hypocrisy.

Topic #2: Today is election day! (God, and I am so astute! Riveting, even!) I love the excitement of election day. I get totally wrapped up in it. It is better than ANY sports game anywhere. This year is a little anti-climatic since I voted way back last week and all...but today is the day:

I hope Bill Ritter becomes our next gov.
I hope Satan Musgrave gets outed as a lesbian (um, and loses too).
I hope the African American guy in Tennessee wins. Just because.
I hope the marijuana bill passes (because that would really be something, and the guy who put it on the ballot is really super cool).
I hope gay people in Colorado get partner rights and that the door remains open for them to legally marry someday.
I hope the Dems take over Congress and the Senate.
I hope you voted (and we all know that means I hope you voted with a liberal mind....haha.).
Seriously, I simply hope you voted.


*Yes, that's how long it took me to get this post finished.